Valentine’s Day is here with its whole entourage of Rose Day, Propose Day, Chocolate Day, Teddy Day, Promise Day, Hug Day, and Kiss Day. This year, we will have a blast celebrating this memorable day with the most special person in your life – You!
Yes, there is no typo; you read that absolutely right. As a woman – we are first mothers, wives, daughters, sisters, and whatnot. We don so many hats in life that we see ourselves as last, if at all. We devote time and effort toward each person in our life. Still, we generally don’t have the luxury of time to be ourselves. We always see our body with a super critical eye – an extra ounce of flab, crow’s eyes, love handles, and a new wrinkle. We teach our children compassion, kindness, and love, but we forget to apply the same lessons to our being. We love to hate ourselves; nothing is ever perfect in the house; nothing is ever right, and we think we fall short all the time, isn’t it?
And my dear, you couldn’t be more wrong. You are perfect (just as you are), have a gorgeous body and a warm and inviting house, and are on top of your game!
And this Valentine’s Day, you will celebrate it with this lovely woman – You, yourself!
- You Have Only One Body
You only have one body to last you this lifetime – one fantastic body which has nurtured and ultimately borne you your lovely children. How can you be critical about something which has produced a miracle for you? You should have one mantra regarding your beautiful body – Love it, Admire it, and Flaunt it.
- Change Your Perspective
Look at yourself in the mirror and see your positives instead of the negatives. See your sparkling eyes and gorgeous smile instead of the extra flab/wrinkles/love handles. Start this exercise with just your face and then slowly extend it over your entire body. Do you see how your smile reaches your eyes, and they dance with joy? The very smile for which your school sweetheart fell over heels in love with you, the same smile that can light up a room and make heads turn. It’s yours! And now, whenever you look at yourself in the mirror, your first task will be to smile at yourself.
- What Did You Do Today, Only For Yourself?
Every woman worth her salt struggles with household tasks, parenting duties, office deadlines, and a humungous amount of cognitive load of minuscule tasks. And your first instinct is to say – ’In all this mayhem, of course, I don’t have time for myself. There’s so much to do; no matter how well I manage my day, something is always pending. So, how in the world do I have the luxury of some me-time?’
And that is where the problem lies. Your me-time is non-negotiable. Just block your calendar for 5/10/15/30 minutes as much as you can manage (to start with), and do one thing you love – have a glass of wine/dance/listen to jazz/paint/read/take a walk, or simply sit and savor the peace.
Believe me; you will go through your to-do list faster and in a better frame of mind after this.
- Don’t Wait – Treat Yourself. You’re Worth It!
We spend so much time, energy, and effort finding the perfect gift for everyone.
But how about gifting the most important person – you?
You knew exactly what gift you wanted for your birthday. No one else did. Even though family and friends tried to surprise you and get you a gift, it wasn’t what your heart desired. And even though you drop hints every year, someone rarely gets it right.
Don’t wait for people to read your mind; you do the honors yourself. And what better way to start this tradition than on the day of love!
- Be Kind To Yourself
You took an extended career break because you had to take care of the brood at home. You restarted your career after years and are behind your peers. No need to be frustrated with yourself in these situations. You did something extraordinary, giving birth, raising kids, and teaching them values they will hold dear to their hearts and be a moral compass for their lives.
Now, isn’t that amazing? But do you realize that you taught your kids how to be kind, but are you kind to yourself? Food for thought, right?
- You Have Only Got You
The apple of our hearts – Children will move away for studies/work and leave an empty nest.
The love of our lives – Spouses/Partners may divorce/breakup/die.
The anchor of our existence – Parents/in-laws will age and may pass away.
The light of our societies – Neighbours/Friends may relocate/sometimes have a tiff with you.
The ones with whom we often spend the maximum time in the day – Office Colleagues may transfer/switch companies or retire.
But in this circle of life, one person is always there for you – YOU!
- No One Understands You Better
Maybe you aren’t feeling very gungho about an impromptu day trip with friends. You may be labeled as a spoilsport if you voice out your concerns. But you know exactly why you aren’t chirpy about the trip – you didn’t get a good night’s sleep, and you are worried that it may trigger your migraine later in the day. Fortunately, when you are your valentine, you don’t need to voice your concerns and be labeled a party pooper.
- The World Will Always See Your Flaws First; Don’t Be ‘Team World’
You meet someone after ages, and they will immediately notice your physical changes and critique them without thinking about how you would perceive them.
You don’t have to add one more critic to your life – yourself.
Instead, you have to add a BFF to your life – Yourself!
- You > Cumulative Sum of Tasks, Deadlines, Accomplishments, To-Dos
In this world, most people see you as someone who does task ‘X.’ Being taken for granted is the norm, whether in the workplace, at home, or with friends. But it isn’t fair on so many levels.
You are much more than the sum of your accomplishments; you deserve to be loved for the same.
At least you can count on one person in the whole wide world to love you irrespective of anything – You!
- Peace of Mind > Anything Else
When you love yourself and have a great bond with yourself, it automatically extends to your other relationships. And that is because you are at peace with yourself when you love yourself.
Peace of mind trumps everything else. People around you will surely notice the positive changes about you; accordingly, they will also try to be a better person around you.
Rome wasn’t built in a day, so improving your relationship with yourself will also take time. Start with a smile (to yourself), and the world is your oyster, babe!
And what better day to start this self-love journey than Valentine’s Day?
There are two simple rules to implement in this new phase in your life:
Rule number 1: You are perfect! Period.
Rule number 2: When in doubt, just remember rule number 1. Amen.
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